Tuesday, November 27, 2012

"That's no mountain for a climber? I know what awaits at the peak? Jesus is waiting on me"http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWhjefc8vHg&feature=related

I told someone today that just before the two brain tumors this year, after a nine year battle with metastatic stage 4 breast cancer to the bones and five years of stage 4 Vulva cancer...that just before this last tumor would be removed and the doctors would put me under once again..asking me to count backwards...my words to my God were all I could think about...that's all that mattered to me...that's when life comes down to moments, not five years plans or months or days.

What I said to Him would mean more to me and not because I was insecure about where I would go if I were not have awoken but because I want Him to understand how much I love Him here and now in this hard place. I said to my Creator, "God, I commit my body and my soul as I have my spirit...as I have my life...You have forever kept me and if I wake to see Your face, then so be it...all I desire is to be swept away for eternity in Your glory. Just continue to hold my family and friends until one day, they meet me there."

I know I will be with my Lord and Savior one day...maybe I won't have the opportunity to grow old but my opportunity is not the lesser. I have the chance to declare His goodness and I will proclaim that for the rest of my days. That said, I still and will always continue to walk in the healing of my precious Lord as He took those stripes on His back for me, for us...for every disease that we would come to know here in this sick and fallen world. 
I know that one day, I will climb a final mountain...we all will...there is a time and a season for us all...but when I reach the top, that peak, He will be there waiting on me. He is my source and my strength and He will not fail me. 

I wanted out of the house today for a while so my mom took me up town where I ran into a church family member. So many memories raced through my mind of teaching children's church and volunteering in Bible school with her so many years ago. My spirit leaped and it was if I was quickly reminded of how deep my walk had grown through the trials and tribulations that has tested my life and my service. See, it's easy to get caught up in all the "churchy" stuff we do and teach our kids but please understand that in this life, there will be great troubles, 'big mountains'...it's at that time, you will have to decide - will you trust Him? Will you roll over in fear as the enemy would hope or expect you to or would you pick up the sword of faith and swing? 
Understand that faith is built daily through His Word, through relationship with Him...the miracle of the Bible...which holds the truths for how we are to govern our lives and in turn what we can expect from Him and we can be sure of this one thing...that He is faithful, the One Who promised. But I want you to understand that there is nothing difficult about a relationship with the Father. God only wants you...all of you. He loves you and there will always be a peace you will find in Him that will surpass all the challenges of this life. I would suggest to you to hold to Him...there is no greater love...not just for your sake of survival but for Him. He paid the price of a son in exchange for you to freely live and freely receive. And He loved you this way before the day you were born into this world. 

He has loved me through it all and I will forever worship Him. What He has promised is a 'closedbook' and cannot and will not ever be undone. No man can add or take away from what He has faithfully promised us. Allow His promises to sweep over you and overtake you with blessings you could never contain on your own. There is nothing greater than the peace of God...over these years, I have learned more about my God and in it all, my life has become completely His...less of me and more of Him. 
He is the giver of life and I want Him to have my life back to do with it as He wills, I want to serve as His vessel, proclaiming His goodness until everyone I can reach even if it only be one, would ask Him to come into their heart and show them this peace, this love, this hope. 

I'm still here and I still have a work to do but it's only by His grace and His mercy that is sufficient and never-ending. 
Friends, There will come a day....will you climb trusting in the One who awaits at the top, the One who watches you to assure your every need? Do you know the One who awaits you faithfully? His name is Jesus. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise - He loves you no matter where you have been or what you have done. He knows you. He loves you. 

I love you, my friends.
Thank you for all you have done for me....I know that every single one of you were placed in my life for a reason by my God. I know you lift me up in prayer and there is no greater love than the love of a neighbor, a friend.
I pray for you, you pray for me and we all win.
God Bless You,